“…Must strangle…Ford Man…”



I have been friends with Dan Weseman, aka: “Ford Man” for a dozen years. Ask any builder who knows us both, if they are being honest, they may say something civil about me, but Dan is nearly universally loved, thought of as a ‘nice guy’. He not only enjoys this, he actually cultures it by quietly needling my temper, with stories of silly builder stunts, and if I publicly boil over, Dan will step in as the calm voice of reason, affirming his ‘nice guy’ status. Its a fun game, and I fall for it nearly every time.


Would your like some insight to why Dan really isn’t the super nice guy he is publicly perceived as? Here is a simple example:



Above, Ford Man fuels the ford on the ride home from the 2018 Zenith Open house.


We departed the Zenith factory about 8pm on Saturday night to take a chunk out of the 1,050 mile return trip. We hit a motel in Paducah about 1 am, and set the alarm for 6 am, hoping to eat dinner at home in Florida. We are exhausted when the alarm goes off, but this doesn’t stop Dan from singing the entire theme to “the Brady Bunch” in a very loud voice. It was his insidious plot to get it stuck in my brain for the rest of the day. It’s a cheap ploy, but it worked. Grabbing a coffee in the lobby, he sets the mental hook by singing the chorus under his breath; I pretend I don’t notice, but it’s sticking; every hour or two in the truck he hums a few bars, and by the time we are nearing Chattanooga, the song is playing on a tape loop in my head, and  he knows this. Progressively through the long day Im losing my mind, and he is getting calmer appearing by the hour. This is how I end up with the reputation as somewhat short fused. If anything happens, Dan will step in and be the calm voice of reason, explaining that I have been under considerable stain, but failing to mention that strain started at 6 am with him blurting out “Here’s the story, of a man named Brady…”


By late afternoon, I’m thinking of strangling him, but he is too big to take on physically, and even if I did, I already know that people would say “Dan is such a nice guy, wonder why that nut William attacked him for no reason…” 




9 Replies to ““…Must strangle…Ford Man…””

  1. Hey Willaim,

    Here’s the story
    Of a lovely lady
    Who was bringing up three very lovely girls
    All of them had hair of gold
    Like their mother
    The youngest one in curls

    It’s the story
    Of a man named Brady
    Who was busy with three boys of his own
    They were four men
    Living all together
    Yet they were all alone

    ‘Til the one day when the lady met this fellow
    And they knew that it was much more than a hunch
    That this group must somehow form a family
    That’s the way we all became the Brady bunch

    The Brady bunch, the Brady bunch
    That’s the way we became the Brady bunch

    Incase you forgot!!!!
    Love you man!!

  2. The way to fight back is with your own “earworm”. [A song that sticks in someone’s head]. I fight back with something stupid like “Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weenie Polkadot Bikini”. or some other stupid song of my own.

    1. “The Purple People Eater” is another one. Sheb Woolley https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9H_cI_WCnE Children’s songs work, too.

      I was too old to really get into the Brady bunch. You’ll notice that my choices are from an earlier era, but you could also do the Gilligan’s Island theme song, but nursery rhyme songs work, too.

      Serenade him loudly enough in the middle of the night to wake him up.

      Have your play list ready.

  3. I have a nine year old. It is needless to point out he likes video game soundtracks and hook-laden lame bands (I give Imagine Dragons up as an example). I try my best to introduce him to Prog and Classic Rock, some of which takes hold. He has played my Queen’s Greatest LP do death and since the Thor:Rangorok came out he has been very fond of the Immigrant Song. But his pesky insistence on playing horrible earworms (such as Imagine Dragon’s Radioactive) is really quite disturbing. He has also found an app that plays the melody of various TV show themes. I always liked the X-file theme but since that app has come into my life by proxy…I have found that rattling around my head for hours. While Dan is all heat and quench…little Johnny tends more like a careless welder whose lack of attention to where the torch is pointed has managed to heat dad’s shorts.

  4. Hahaha…humour must be honored in a man for whom the life and death of builders is a saintly obsession! I suggest memorizing Miles Davis’ All Blues a capella, or, possibly, with help of a tissue paper/comb kazoo….If that doesn’t cause him to emergency mode and a brake smoking shoulder stop, I suggest continuing on with the lyrics found here: https://tinyurl.com/yc8mhtns. After all, your excuse could be that a FordMan would have appreciated ‘Blue’, eh? {;^)

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